Defensive Line

The way we think about current experiences or remember past situations, will at times, bring a smile to our face. This BLOG came about due to a simple picture. Nothing grand or spectacular to shout about, just a picture of a golden yellow kitten.

I was at work and had the pleasure (yes, work can be pleasurable) of viewing a magazine with a kitten on the cover. The kitten transported my mind back to an afternoon in 1970. My mother cleaned house for a white family, and since I only attended school for half-days, I went with her. I won't add that in the 80's my mother told me that their house was nasty. It wasn't nasty because they were white, it was nasty because they were nasty. Oh, I wasn't going to add that part...oops.

My family lived on 22nd Street in Niagara Falls and I shared a room with my brother. A 4 year old girl who longed for a life of luxury - yeah, right, going to a house where another little girl had her own room fit for a princess was life! I can't remember the family or the girl's name, but her room was fancy to me. She had a pink bedroom and her bed had a pink comforter with pillows that were covered in lace. The room also had a rocking chair, dolls and more toys than I had ever seen. We weren't po', but dang, she had stuff.

She also had kittens. I usually exaggerate the story by saying there were at least 450 kittens. This will forever be visible, so I'll tell the truth and say there were 3 kittens. Still, when I tell it live, it may be 4 to 50'leven kittens. 

What child wouldn't want to play with a pet? My daddy didn't buy our first daschund, Schultz, until I was 5, so those kittens were going to get all the love my 4 year old heart had to give.

How was I supposed to know the kittens didn't want love? Nobody told me that you shouldn't corner a kitten, cat or any animal. Man, I got jacked up!

The kittens crawled under the little girl's bed to get away from me and I wasn't having any of their escape tactics. I lay flat on my stomach and slid forward to pull them out. My sliding forward terrified them, causing them to move backwards. When their backsides hit the wall they had no where to go. Attack!

Those kittens tore me up! Kitten claws and teeth bit my face, hands and neck. I didn't think to slide backwards but I did think to scream. Have you ever paid attention to how loud a child is? If you have a high tolerance for noise, listen to any random child's voice. It's annoying and especially loud when you're not the parent of the child.

The kittens tore me up for 30 minutes (not really, it was only a few seconds, but I digress) before I felt the little girl's mother grab my feet and slide me from under the bed. Oooooooooweeeeeee, traumatic...

Memories are always a beautiful thing when you learn something about yourself and realize, hey, maybe you're not so bad after all. Defensive line.

The kittens had a defensive line. Everyone has a defensive line. I have a defensive line. The question is, is there a right and/or a wrong way to protect your line?

Sports teams have a defensive squad and their job is to stop the invasion by all means necessary. You will not score on my watch. 

Is that how you view your life? Are you always on the defense? Is life always coming for you? Who attempted to or has crossed your line? By what means did you deem, all means necessary,  to stop them?

Sometimes its "us" or "you", and the choices "we" make that cause the issue. Sometimes people like to "see" what will happen when the bear is poked. If your reaction is the same as the kittens, the culprit always views you as the problem. If you do nothing, you're weak or soft. Still, you and we have a right to protect our boundaries. Don't cross the line and "make" or "force" a Hulk like experience - "Don't make me angry. You won't like me when I'm angry."

I didn't get mad at the kittens for violating my face. I cried and whined while the white lady consoled me. My mother was just about tired of my loud mouth and most likely couldn't wait for my daddy to pick us up.

"I told you to leave them alone!"

Now I realized that I embarrassed her, but at the time, I was 4, tore up, and was not able to understand. Up in the white man's house cuttin' up a fool. One time I flipped the rocking chair over trying to make it take off like a swing on the playground. Cuttin' up a whole fool...😂

Adults tend to get mad at the person who they crossed the line with. Believing that they are never wrong doesn't help either. Ask yourself are you "that" person, or are you "that" person?

Two things that I've learned from this memory are, 1. I do like kittens and cats, I just don't want one. The other is you have the right to protect yourself. Not saying you should blast everyone, just saying protect your defensive line. 

If you've bulldozed your way into someone's space and happen to be the recipient of grown up kitten claws, don't get mad and don't get even. Get some get right up in you and keep on living. If you've been bulldozed, forgive and keep on living. Either way the common denominator is to keep on living.

I luv you.

My forever wittle babies, Schultz, Fritz and Frank❤